by Thomas Hawk

Make the World your Clam: Create a Blog

With the advent of the internet comes the freedom to publish whatever the heck we want. One of the ways that people can do this is to create a blog. Before one can create a blog one must first ask one’s self, “Do I know what a blog is?” The answer to this is, “Of course I don’t! It’s another one of those weird words that people made up, words like “nerd” and “gnarly” and “post office employee!”

In order to create a blog it is absolutely essential for one to understand blogs. First off – blogging is short for weblog (web because it is a tangled web that one weaves when one dost create a blog, a web used to ensnare others and subtly coerce them into concurring with our opinions. Log because we want our opinions to feel nice & cozy yet outdoorsy, something that would make one think “Gee, I really should stop here & sit and think & ponder on the significance of life” in the manner that one starts to think upon viewing a log during a long hike in the woods). Now that you know the etymology of the word “blog” you are almost ready to create a blog.

But before we one is allowed to create a blog, one must also understand about free web hosting, and where one can go to launch a free blog. The typical two sites for blog hosting are blogger.com & livejournal.com.

You should choose between these two carefully. Blogger.com is more friendly for those who wish to create a blog to just dink around with, perhaps maybe write something semi-witty, or occasionally write one’s opinions on various subjects of import such as how people rarely have time to enjoy toast with butter & jam these days and how this is directly linked to the downfall of the United States.

Livejournal.com on the other hand, is a site in which people get on there, & create a blog to state their overly-emotional opinions on everything in the world. They might possibly state something about how they wish they were loved, or how when they were a child their parents once gave them only 2 stuffed toys instead of 3, and how emotionally scarred they were from this incident. They will use this to show the world the way they really feel & illustrate how strong they are by putting up a brave front and silently & courageously suffering through this misery all on their own. No, that is not merely whining explained in a fancy manner. It is expressing one’s opinion through the purity of blogging.

Although these are the two main things that one may wish to do when they create a blog, one may also go the less traditional route, and create a blog that allows them to do movie reviews, perhaps a photoblog in which one can post pictures of important events, like the trimming of one’s hangnails. Another option is a real estate blog in which you could document the various houses that you would like to live in if you were Bill Gates.

You can do whatever you want. When you create a blog, the world is your clam.

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